To Hold on or To Let go?

(NOTE: This can be considered, somehow, as a continuation of my previous blog. Enjoy.)

"To hold on or to let go?"

Might be a simple question, but bears a reality-biting statement.

A question that got stuck in my head while i was talking to a friend of mine whose having troubles with her current boyfriend. To tell you the truth, i'm getting confused on their current state right now. I've given every advice tidbits that i can manage to squeeze in this hollow mind of mine. To give you a picture on their status, here it goes:

For the past 2 or 3 years now, they're a on/off, on/off relationship status. Very unstable. Neither one of them would even consider conceding to one another whenever someone commited a mistake, on purpose or not. Even the smallest of things can turn into a terrible argument that sometimes led them into physical confrontation (which i strongly condemn). My friend insists that they had happy memories, which is, needless to say, (MAYBE) the only thing she's holding on to. Then, she said, after all the things that happened to them, she still loves him. But, on the flip side, she wants to lose the grip on the special attachment she's having for that guy, 'cause, in a way, she's tired already..

So, for me, who's giving an advice, made it more mind-boggling than ever before.

I was about to eat my lunch when i suddenly felt i need to write this down first before it completely evaporates from my memory tank. There are other kinds of relationships that can be far worse than what my friend is currently undergoing right now, but, this one made me ask myself first: "If i was in her shoes, what should i do?"

I've given her advices that could uplift her spirits, 'cause she's not in a very good condition right now: she said she's much more stressed than ever before, doesn't eat well, can't have a good sleep at nights. She's actually thinking too much, with the pressures of looking for a new job to occupy her and keep her busy. To make it short, she's not in a very good shape right now. Then, there's this arguments that they're having for quite a while now, may it be a small one or big. She said the guy had his fair share of mistakes and bad decisions, at the same time, she admitted to be like that, too. But she's so adamant in her refusal to say sorry, maybe the guy's the same too.. So i can only think of one problem.

The main culprit: PRIDE.

Problems will never, ever be worked out when a couple keeps on defying each other's intrepid arrogance. Pride never solves problem and it can only make matters worse. A relationship can be kept healthy for this two things: you both TRUST and UNDERSTAND each other. It may not be the best component a relationship needs, but it's one of the most vital and important. Fighting is normal in a relationship, and sometimes, although not necessary, it's one of the main reasons that can keep couples going and produce a healthier, fruitful accord. Of course, you need to mix it with patience, faithfulness and unconditional love. That, is the most important of them all: Unconditional Love. I felt sad for her when she mentioned that they had arguments that turned into physical altercations. I think they both have no right to hit one another, most especially for the guys out ther (including me). Women are born to be loved, not to be hurt. That goes the same for women; men are to be loved, too. Equality. No special strings attached.

She's been asking me what to do, and i've given her (i think) the most appropriate advices a friend could give. I don't want to give advices and a false impression that may look like i'm "intervening" with their affairs, so i'm doing my best to be fair all the time. Although she's my friend, i'm not picking sides. I'm praying that they both learn how to forgive. It's just that, it's hard to convince one of them to relinquish their hold on their pride. She's in dissaray now, because she's not sure if she still has to hold on to a dysfunctional relationship, so i'm trying to keep her optimistic and keeping her spirits high at all times. She's just the one who's being the opposite. Despite that, i know that she's doing her best to look on the bright side of things in life. It's not easy for other people (including her), but it's something not impossible to obtain one day.

To my friend, always pray. Don't worry, i'm praying for you, too..

Well if you have other suggestion/comments, feel free to leave one.

God bless.

Love Adviser (or Advicer or Advisor or...)

The heck with that!

I don't even know what word to use in my blog title. That just shows my gaping holes in writing. But anyways, as long as you all get what i mean, that's all that matters.

I, suddenly became an adviser about love. Well, i don't think i'm that good at giving advices, but somehow, i can see that my words of encouragement work for those broken-hearted people. I'm not sure how it works for them, but i know it worked for me before. But to tell you the truth, i thought it was easy at first to give random advices for everyone. I thought wrong. Sometimes, i can't find the words to deliver. My mind dries up from time to time. Although, it doesn't get me into any trouble, my willingness to help others and give advices is stressful enough for me when i can't speak my mind well. I find great satisfaction when i can see (or feel) someone that i've helped them for just using words of comfort.

As i zip thru my cup of coffee while typing these words that has nothing to do with my topic (i mean, this sentence), i try to recall those times that i transformed into Mr. Cupid. Well, as i've said earlier, there were numerous instances that i'm overflowing with good advices, but there are times ,too, that when i overgeneralize, i tend to go thru drought phase. So, to conclude, advicing never was (and never will be) an easy task. I'm trying my best to marginalize my capacity, but i think it still needs a lot of improvement from now on. (And i almost spill the coffee on the laptop --- ALMOST..)

Even though i'm not sure all the words i speak for advices works, the fact that i can make someone comfortable and be optimistic are satisfying enough for me. So, i guess, it'll be always like that from now on.

Have a pleasant day, everyone. Godspeed.

Worrisome

Okay, it's one of those days where your jaws hang up 'cause you don't have anything to keep you busy. And on a monday? Darn it. Mix it with dreadful weather? That pretty explains my day's start.

I've been a housekeeper for a week now, 'cause a friend asked me if i can keep their house safe while they're at work. Someone's fixing the toilet that's supposed to be done by Tuesday of last week. But because of ther hang-ups and tardiness, it took another week and here we are, on a monday, waiting for no one to come (UPDATE: Eventually, no one came). The only thing they need to do is to reinstall the sink to it's rightful place --- and that's it. But suddenly, they're a no-show today, without even reminding us that they're not coming. So, from 7 in the morning (Milan time) up to quarter to 5 in the afternoon (right now.. and still counting..), i've been sitting my a** around with only this laptop as my companion for the day that passed. So, i'm guessing that they're not coming anytime today and i have to be back tomorrow (it's not that i don't like to go back, but, they're milking their way to earn easy money --- without the owner's idea what're they doing and where the heck they are right now. It's just plain terrible.

And then there's the weather. You mix it from the classlessness of those hourly-paid workers to this gloomy, dreadful weather (since monday last week, as well): an AMAZING MONDAY i had (sarcasm).

Great. That's just great.. (sarcasm part 2)

But anyways, i'm expecting them to finish what they're supposed to finish today, and i'm hoping for a better climate tomorrow. I thought that summer season's approaching? Oh well, no use complaining at all.

Still, have a pleasant week to everyone. (For me, too..)

Godspeed.

Farewell, Superman!

A face that will be missed around the league.

(Courtesy: counterkicks.com)

"A grand entrance deserves a grander exit."

When Shaq entered the NBA in 1992, he was one of the guys highly touted to dominate the league for years and years to come. Well, obviousluy, he didn't disappoint fans, the media ,and the whole wide world when he stepped on the hardwood for the first time; 4 NBA Championships, 3 NBA Finals MVP's, 1 Regular season MVP, a one-time Olympic Gold medalist, and other great achievements too many to mention to describe his illustrious career.Truly, one of the best, if not, the best center to play the game (with all due respect toother great centers). He'll be greatly missed.

And most importantly, Shaq will be missed for his, (literally) wide sense of humor.

During his glory days with Kobe Bryant and the Lakers

(Courtesy: Los Angeles Times)

Shaquille O'neal is one of the most colorful and polarizing figures to have ever graced the league. Known for his funny and hilarious quotes and antics, he's been followed around by media, and whenever he speaks, everyone listens. You gave him the microphone, you're definitely gonna hear something that's gonna break you into tears while laughing your a** out. A big guy who has great insights during interviews, he called himself "The Big Aristotle and Hobo Master". He also had a variety of nicknames he used over the years of his basketball supremacy: "Shaq", "The Diesel", "Shaq Fu", "The Big Daddy", "Superman", "The Big Agave", "The Big Cactus (and Shaqtus)" and many more to mention.

While this larger-than-life athlete bears a heart of kid off the court, on the court, he's a destructive and dominant force. He redefined the meaning of "using brute force", but still he has a wide array of moves and tactics that we seldomly saw from the other big men. On his prime, he can score at will, block shots into the stands, could do cross-over like a point guard, can sprint down the court like an olympic runner. The only weakness that this big fella has was the free throw shooting (something he jokingly said he'll "miss" during his retirement speech).

Announcing his retirement.

While being popular for his funny acts, he also drew wide attention for the controversies he's been involved with. During his tenure with the Orlando Magic, O'neal had a power struggle playing under then-coach Brian Hill, his comments towards Yao Ming during the Rockets centers' rookie season, his dispute with Kobe Bryant and also the manage of the Los Angeles Lakers during his stint there, and several other things, but he handled all of it perfectly well. Eventually, years passed, he learned to accept wholeheartedly secondary roles for the team he played for after his Lakers campaign. Been there, done that. that's one thing he said while he had his days with the Heat, Suns, Cavaliers and previously, the Celtics.

Shaq will also be remembered for his rap albums and (he said) award-winning film Kazaam. Even if he became a celebrity in his own right, he gives great importance to education. He just secured his master's degree and now currently working on his Ph.D on human resource development in Barry University in Miami, Florida. He said in an article that: "i'm done with the nicknames. Actually, when i obtain my doctorate, i will not allow people to call me Shaq anymore, either". Asked what will they call him, he said "Dr. O'neal". Even at his exit, he never fails to crack everyone with his humor. His retirement announcement in front of the media press were full of laughs, so, maybe that's one way he wants to be remembered - as a real and touchable person.

It's hard to find a player as dominating as he was on the hardwood, a goof ball at the same time. For the past 19 years, he has been entertaining each and everyone of us and he promised to entertain us again for the next 19 years (he mentioned in his speech that he's open for commentating, whether it's TNT, ESPN, CNN or whatever sports media outlets. Hope you're all listening, hehe..). The Lakers decided to retire his No. 34 jersey, so he'll be in the rafters with all the greats of the league. A surefire Hall-of-Famer, soon as well.

You'll be missed, Shaq (Dr. O'neal in the future). Thanks for an amazing and joyful ride. Been a heck of a career. Farewell.

God bless.

"Superman"

Hockeytown!

Certified Red Wing Fan

From now on, i'll try to put blog posts connected to my favorite team in NHL, the Detroit Red Wings. I haven't done this before for my other favorite sports, NBA and the UFC. Although, i'm not a registered or professional correspondent, being a fan (for me) qualifies me to put my thoughts, game reviews and everything connected under the Winged Wheel banner. Even if i only started to become a full-time hockey fan for at least 2 years, i've been watching this sport way back 2000, when i was still in the Philippines (a country that NEVER plays hockey) I was fortunate enough to catch some games thru our cable television for the past decade now. Right now, i'm living in Italy, a football-dominated country, so i'm using the cyberspace to be able to catch the games, interviews, updates about the Red Wings and the NHL in general. I'm still on a learning process about the sport, so, please, bear with me. I'm no reporter or anything, i'm just a Red Wing fan/blogger.

It's just sad that i started to write a blog about my favorite team after they got eliminated last month in the Western Conference Semis by San Jose Sharks (doh!), but anyways, looking forward to next season.

Bring back the Cup to Hockeytown, next season guys!

Good day.

Thanks for the memories, Friendster.

(March 22, 2002 - May 31, 2011)

More than a month ago, i wrote about Friendster losing it's profound relevance to the current social media juggernaut, Facebook. Now, i'm writing like, a "sort-of-eulogy" about the once-dominant fixture of social networking platforms.

God, how time flies by. And how time changes so fast.

I logged on to my Friendster account now --- for the last time, to remove/delete personal files from that website. Then, suddenly my mind went back down the memory lane. It's quite hard to put words together while being nostalgic. Kinda "choking" the words. I checked back on my personal profile, to write my last shoutout, thanking Friendster for all the memories it kept for quite some time now. I also passed thru my old blogs, where my immaturity and childishness happened. Funny how i come up and write blogs from before. Some of them, doesn't make sense at all. Some of them, well, discussing about certain topics/issues. But, anyways, i just want to check how much i've improved my writing skills. I also checked the testimonial/comments section of my profile. Some of the testimonials, dates way back 2004, so it's really been a while. It's also good to stumble upon my own profile preferences: a lot of funny and stupid stuffs were still there. Never moved, never changed. There's really too much to check about this place i've been for a long time. Taking it from a title of a song, i'm "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss".

I'm not being sentimental on Friendster's departure on the social networking world. The site will undergo major overhaul and will be more focused on social entertainment now (mostly, on music and games), i just don't know if they'll still keep the name "Friendster" (my guess is no). So, even in Friendster's demise, we have to celebrate it's past achievements so all we can remember are about the good memories we enjoyed for almost a decade.

But, even if i want to stave off from analyzing what caused Friendster's departure, it's an argument everyone could've had a hard time dismissing it. Before, it was a very hot item, like a can't-miss collegiate basketball prospect player. Now? it's just a thing of the past. An old shadow of itself. Don't get me wrong, i give all my due respect to the founders and everyone associated with Friendster. Nobody's taking away the success they had in recent years. It will always be like that. But, when Facebook rose to prominence, almost everyone joined the bandwagon and left Friendster for dead (even me). I barely even access my FS account for the past 3 years, so i have no idea what happened to Friendster. I don't even make time to check the then-updates that time, 'cause for me, nobody seemed to care anymore and it was a waste of time. It was like, "it has to be Facebook all the time, no more Friendster for me."

Then this day came.

Well, take it from a saying: "Nothing lasts forever". Friendster had it's glory days and success, it's just that now, maybe it's really time for them to take another step and close the curtains on their hottest and most prized commodity. But i'll always remember, that it'll be always the original for the testimonials (where friends really writes something on how good you are), the "Who's viewed my Profile?" and "Last logged-ins", and all patented firsts, courtesy of Friendster.

Well, the planned rejuvenation of Friendster will still keep our accounts, without all our personal files. But, i really have no intentions of keeping it anymore. So, as i was writing this blog, is also the time for me to close down my Friendster account.

To close this blog, i just want to say thank you to Friendster for opening the world to social networking. Becoming pioneers are a great achievement, and you'll never, ever be forgotten. We'll always keep in mind what you've done to us is something we will treasure for all our lives. It's good while it lasted.

Thanks for the memories, Friendster. Good bye.

A Love that never was

Just a week ago, i have to move out (AGAIN) from my previous place because of bed bug terrorism. I still have those bite marks that left me irritated. For a month of stay over there, i never had a good sleep (even though i woke up most of the time at 11 am), 'cause i've always been bothered with just a slight itch, so it was like i have to stay awake all night to wait and catch those bed bugs. Fortunately, the new place i moved into was such a nice place. I even have a bed that can fit three people. So, i was rolling around that bed. AND, i finally had a good, peaceful and bed-bug-free sleep.

(I have another brewing problem over that new place, but i won't say it here now. Maybe, next time.)

One good sign that definitely can say that i had a good sleep is having a good dream. Well, this dream is not just a dream: it's something played a significant role with my life. She was someone that i first talked through the telephone. Introduced by a good friend of mine from grade school. She's the same age as mine (i guess), a mix breed of Mexican, American and Filipina. I can still clearly recall her name.

Michaela Morgan.

It was during 2002, my first year in college. I received a random phone call from someone almost late in the evening. When i picked-up the phone, her voice was enveloped with calmness. I asked her how she was able to get my home phone number, she mentioned my grade school buddy. She came from a good, wealthy family who lives in Valle Verde Subdivision in Pasig. Well, me, i came from a working middle-class family who lives in the outskirts of Manila. I was so young back then, so i have this insecurity-feeling that she won't like me at all. But she was everything i had expected. Sincere, thoughtful, god-fearing person. We talked night after night, got mutually attached to one another (well, that's how i feel). And, the rest was history.

I wrote about her because, for two straight nights, i've dreamt of her. I don't know why but suddenly i felt the need to share this story. Well, the last time i've talked to her is way back 2004, and the last thing i've heard about her is that she moved to the United States. We lost all the communication and haven't kept in touch to one another, so, i don't have any news about her. I even tried looking for her thru Facebook, but, heck! There's a lot of Michaela Morgan's around the world. If only i was brave enough back then, but i wasn't. I wasn't able to tell her that i love her. My reason was --- because of our family classifications. As what i have said, They're a wealthy family and we're a middle-class family. I know it's a dumb and stupid reason for me to have, but back then, it makes sense to me. But now, obviously, it doesn't make sense at all. It was almost a decade ago now, so, now, suddenly i wonder how and where she is now.

There's a lot of "What if's" running through my mind right now. What if i told her? What could've been? Now, i know i can't provide the answers to my own questions 'cause i took a different path of life. I just suddenly felt sad that i didn't had the guts and strength to voice out my true feelings. But, of course, my action served a lot of lessons, so i know now that i'm a much better person.

I did not write this 'cause i regret not doing the right things (well, somehow, i am, hehe.. but not to it's full extent), but to remind other people that when you have the chance to say something towards a person that you love, seize the moment. No screw-ups, no shortcuts, just make a plain and simple statement. Learn in from me, who had all the chance to say it, but chose to hold back. It's a Love that never was.