Year One: Trials and Tribulations

Today is August 22, 2011. Been here in Italy for exactly a year today. Well, nothing much has changed and i'm still undergoing certain pressures from various circumstances. So, to simplify what i said, it's still a life struggle here. What have i done for the past year?

Hmmm... Nothing much...

This year that passed is one of my most underachieving years in my life, in terms of securing a bright future and financial stability. I'm not raising my expectations too much for myself or else, i'll be disappointed in the end. It's just that, i've accomplished little things (i don't even know the extent of the things i've accomplished). So, up to now, i'm on a personal struggle for survival in life. I'm not scrutinizing myself in any sort, but, as an observer, that's what happened in my life for just a year. It feels like i'm almost beaten into a pulp. No one to count on to but myself. Over the course of the year that passed, my future looked so gloomy and very uncertain.

Even though i'm burdened with adversities right now, i can still find calmness in times like these. My perseverance grews even more stronger with the help of God, my family, my friends and my special someone. They are my life's inspirations. With them, i'm pushing myself not to succumb to misfortunes in life. It's part of growing up. We all know that. Good thing, the power of prayer never fails. It's my daily (and the best) source of energy, strength and courage to move on and challenge life. Prayer.

So Year One had it's time. Now, it's time to start counting for Year Two, starting today.

God bless, everyone..

Future hanging in the balance

I've been in different circumstances before. This current situation i have is no different from others. Facing life outside my homeland without my loved ones around me made it more difficult to move on with life, but it made me more defiant than ever before. Troubles, struggles, and problems were just my normal companions, so it's just natural for me to be hardened with the help of the environment i'm living with. I had my ups and downs, despite that, i'm still standing tall and proud. I just can't help ponder my future, where it's currently hanging in the balance, hanging by a thread.

I'm not thinking of it so much, however, i just can't stay away from being nullified. Yeah, i may only be 25 years old, but as time flies, so for opportunities too. I'm not being pessimistic, i just set my expectations for myself too high. So, whenever i wasn't able to obtain what i want, i feel terribly bad for myself. So much for having high expectations.

But on the bright side, as what i have said earlier, it made me hardened as a person - meaning, it tested my strongest attributes to it's limits: patience, perseverance, faith and sacrifice. Those virtues i talked about are the ones that's keeping my feet on the ground. Uncertainty is just the problem i'm focusing on right now, 'cause it may take forever to find answers to make it "certain".

For now, i just want to enjoy life. Hanging in the balance? Nah, it'll find it's own course one day (i mean, my own life course..). As much for being tired thinking too much, i have one solution that i know would be the best answer for all those mishaps...

... I'll go eat my heart out! Hehe..

OH MY!

Caption: "When you think you know what you're doing, you think wrong.."

Fantasizing about UltraMan and MagmaMan

"Yo' the man!"

I was down in front of the computer again to do my usual routines and eating my brunch at the same time (yeah, i didn't make time again for breakfast. Big deal) while surfing some videos from Youtube when i stumbled upon the videos of my favorite TV shows when i was a kid, Ultraman and Magmaman. I can't help but to feel nostalgic once again, reminiscing my happy-go-lucky days of childhood. I think i was in Grade one or in Grade two when i first saw the TV series, back when YouTube is just in it's creator's mind. And the first time i watched it, there's also a brewing typhoon that time (so, i'm guessing i watched it on 1991 or 1994, not so sure about that anymore..)

I consider Ultraman and Magmaman as one my childhood heroes. I never failed to watch a single episode of each of the shows, although to ask me now if i can name a single, significant episode is a bit unfair 'cause it's more than a decade ago since the last time i saw it on TV. I remember watching it on ABS-CBN before their current affairs show, "Hoy, Gising!". Then after i watched it, i'm trying to imitate them both. I'm making my own miniature buildings and environment to trash and destroy afterwards. I even use an ordinary ballpen and imagine it as those power-up thingys i used to see when they're transforming into their respective costumed-heroes. I dig Ultraman's outfit than Magmamans', although i like reckon the bloated eyes of Magmaman, like he was left in the water for days.

Lately, i haven't seen any show like these that came out (well, there was, but it's also the Ultraman franchise) that captured the kids' attention. We had so much cartoons today, but not as appealing as the ones who were produced in the 90's. Maybe, demographically speaking, the tempo just changed because of the viewer's demands.

The Eye-bloated super hero.

Even though times have changed and decades passed, it's still one of the things i would love to see all over again. But then i wonder: Aren't they gonna be Hollywood films one day?

Well, my argument seems to be too hollow and featherbrained, i can't help wonder why after all these years (and more than a decade, too), that it has yet to be immortalized on the big screen. As one of the avid fans of this show, i'm absolutely fantasizing about seeing them on the silver screen. But despite my enthusiasm, there may be other conflicting reasons why it has yet to grace the hollywood (reasons that i don't know). After all, Ultraman and Magmaman originally debuted in 1966 and 1973, respectively, so no one (maybe) in this current generation knows who the heck are they. But anyways, maybe one day it can be fulfilled, and i'll be the first ones to line up in the cinemas to watch it --- if, it ever happens.

So, as long as it yet to happen, it'll just stay as a fantasy.

To Hold on or To Let go?

(NOTE: This can be considered, somehow, as a continuation of my previous blog. Enjoy.)

"To hold on or to let go?"

Might be a simple question, but bears a reality-biting statement.

A question that got stuck in my head while i was talking to a friend of mine whose having troubles with her current boyfriend. To tell you the truth, i'm getting confused on their current state right now. I've given every advice tidbits that i can manage to squeeze in this hollow mind of mine. To give you a picture on their status, here it goes:

For the past 2 or 3 years now, they're a on/off, on/off relationship status. Very unstable. Neither one of them would even consider conceding to one another whenever someone commited a mistake, on purpose or not. Even the smallest of things can turn into a terrible argument that sometimes led them into physical confrontation (which i strongly condemn). My friend insists that they had happy memories, which is, needless to say, (MAYBE) the only thing she's holding on to. Then, she said, after all the things that happened to them, she still loves him. But, on the flip side, she wants to lose the grip on the special attachment she's having for that guy, 'cause, in a way, she's tired already..

So, for me, who's giving an advice, made it more mind-boggling than ever before.

I was about to eat my lunch when i suddenly felt i need to write this down first before it completely evaporates from my memory tank. There are other kinds of relationships that can be far worse than what my friend is currently undergoing right now, but, this one made me ask myself first: "If i was in her shoes, what should i do?"

I've given her advices that could uplift her spirits, 'cause she's not in a very good condition right now: she said she's much more stressed than ever before, doesn't eat well, can't have a good sleep at nights. She's actually thinking too much, with the pressures of looking for a new job to occupy her and keep her busy. To make it short, she's not in a very good shape right now. Then, there's this arguments that they're having for quite a while now, may it be a small one or big. She said the guy had his fair share of mistakes and bad decisions, at the same time, she admitted to be like that, too. But she's so adamant in her refusal to say sorry, maybe the guy's the same too.. So i can only think of one problem.

The main culprit: PRIDE.

Problems will never, ever be worked out when a couple keeps on defying each other's intrepid arrogance. Pride never solves problem and it can only make matters worse. A relationship can be kept healthy for this two things: you both TRUST and UNDERSTAND each other. It may not be the best component a relationship needs, but it's one of the most vital and important. Fighting is normal in a relationship, and sometimes, although not necessary, it's one of the main reasons that can keep couples going and produce a healthier, fruitful accord. Of course, you need to mix it with patience, faithfulness and unconditional love. That, is the most important of them all: Unconditional Love. I felt sad for her when she mentioned that they had arguments that turned into physical altercations. I think they both have no right to hit one another, most especially for the guys out ther (including me). Women are born to be loved, not to be hurt. That goes the same for women; men are to be loved, too. Equality. No special strings attached.

She's been asking me what to do, and i've given her (i think) the most appropriate advices a friend could give. I don't want to give advices and a false impression that may look like i'm "intervening" with their affairs, so i'm doing my best to be fair all the time. Although she's my friend, i'm not picking sides. I'm praying that they both learn how to forgive. It's just that, it's hard to convince one of them to relinquish their hold on their pride. She's in dissaray now, because she's not sure if she still has to hold on to a dysfunctional relationship, so i'm trying to keep her optimistic and keeping her spirits high at all times. She's just the one who's being the opposite. Despite that, i know that she's doing her best to look on the bright side of things in life. It's not easy for other people (including her), but it's something not impossible to obtain one day.

To my friend, always pray. Don't worry, i'm praying for you, too..

Well if you have other suggestion/comments, feel free to leave one.

God bless.

Love Adviser (or Advicer or Advisor or...)

The heck with that!

I don't even know what word to use in my blog title. That just shows my gaping holes in writing. But anyways, as long as you all get what i mean, that's all that matters.

I, suddenly became an adviser about love. Well, i don't think i'm that good at giving advices, but somehow, i can see that my words of encouragement work for those broken-hearted people. I'm not sure how it works for them, but i know it worked for me before. But to tell you the truth, i thought it was easy at first to give random advices for everyone. I thought wrong. Sometimes, i can't find the words to deliver. My mind dries up from time to time. Although, it doesn't get me into any trouble, my willingness to help others and give advices is stressful enough for me when i can't speak my mind well. I find great satisfaction when i can see (or feel) someone that i've helped them for just using words of comfort.

As i zip thru my cup of coffee while typing these words that has nothing to do with my topic (i mean, this sentence), i try to recall those times that i transformed into Mr. Cupid. Well, as i've said earlier, there were numerous instances that i'm overflowing with good advices, but there are times ,too, that when i overgeneralize, i tend to go thru drought phase. So, to conclude, advicing never was (and never will be) an easy task. I'm trying my best to marginalize my capacity, but i think it still needs a lot of improvement from now on. (And i almost spill the coffee on the laptop --- ALMOST..)

Even though i'm not sure all the words i speak for advices works, the fact that i can make someone comfortable and be optimistic are satisfying enough for me. So, i guess, it'll be always like that from now on.

Have a pleasant day, everyone. Godspeed.

Worrisome

Okay, it's one of those days where your jaws hang up 'cause you don't have anything to keep you busy. And on a monday? Darn it. Mix it with dreadful weather? That pretty explains my day's start.

I've been a housekeeper for a week now, 'cause a friend asked me if i can keep their house safe while they're at work. Someone's fixing the toilet that's supposed to be done by Tuesday of last week. But because of ther hang-ups and tardiness, it took another week and here we are, on a monday, waiting for no one to come (UPDATE: Eventually, no one came). The only thing they need to do is to reinstall the sink to it's rightful place --- and that's it. But suddenly, they're a no-show today, without even reminding us that they're not coming. So, from 7 in the morning (Milan time) up to quarter to 5 in the afternoon (right now.. and still counting..), i've been sitting my a** around with only this laptop as my companion for the day that passed. So, i'm guessing that they're not coming anytime today and i have to be back tomorrow (it's not that i don't like to go back, but, they're milking their way to earn easy money --- without the owner's idea what're they doing and where the heck they are right now. It's just plain terrible.

And then there's the weather. You mix it from the classlessness of those hourly-paid workers to this gloomy, dreadful weather (since monday last week, as well): an AMAZING MONDAY i had (sarcasm).

Great. That's just great.. (sarcasm part 2)

But anyways, i'm expecting them to finish what they're supposed to finish today, and i'm hoping for a better climate tomorrow. I thought that summer season's approaching? Oh well, no use complaining at all.

Still, have a pleasant week to everyone. (For me, too..)

Godspeed.

Farewell, Superman!

A face that will be missed around the league.

(Courtesy: counterkicks.com)

"A grand entrance deserves a grander exit."

When Shaq entered the NBA in 1992, he was one of the guys highly touted to dominate the league for years and years to come. Well, obviousluy, he didn't disappoint fans, the media ,and the whole wide world when he stepped on the hardwood for the first time; 4 NBA Championships, 3 NBA Finals MVP's, 1 Regular season MVP, a one-time Olympic Gold medalist, and other great achievements too many to mention to describe his illustrious career.Truly, one of the best, if not, the best center to play the game (with all due respect toother great centers). He'll be greatly missed.

And most importantly, Shaq will be missed for his, (literally) wide sense of humor.

During his glory days with Kobe Bryant and the Lakers

(Courtesy: Los Angeles Times)

Shaquille O'neal is one of the most colorful and polarizing figures to have ever graced the league. Known for his funny and hilarious quotes and antics, he's been followed around by media, and whenever he speaks, everyone listens. You gave him the microphone, you're definitely gonna hear something that's gonna break you into tears while laughing your a** out. A big guy who has great insights during interviews, he called himself "The Big Aristotle and Hobo Master". He also had a variety of nicknames he used over the years of his basketball supremacy: "Shaq", "The Diesel", "Shaq Fu", "The Big Daddy", "Superman", "The Big Agave", "The Big Cactus (and Shaqtus)" and many more to mention.

While this larger-than-life athlete bears a heart of kid off the court, on the court, he's a destructive and dominant force. He redefined the meaning of "using brute force", but still he has a wide array of moves and tactics that we seldomly saw from the other big men. On his prime, he can score at will, block shots into the stands, could do cross-over like a point guard, can sprint down the court like an olympic runner. The only weakness that this big fella has was the free throw shooting (something he jokingly said he'll "miss" during his retirement speech).

Announcing his retirement.

While being popular for his funny acts, he also drew wide attention for the controversies he's been involved with. During his tenure with the Orlando Magic, O'neal had a power struggle playing under then-coach Brian Hill, his comments towards Yao Ming during the Rockets centers' rookie season, his dispute with Kobe Bryant and also the manage of the Los Angeles Lakers during his stint there, and several other things, but he handled all of it perfectly well. Eventually, years passed, he learned to accept wholeheartedly secondary roles for the team he played for after his Lakers campaign. Been there, done that. that's one thing he said while he had his days with the Heat, Suns, Cavaliers and previously, the Celtics.

Shaq will also be remembered for his rap albums and (he said) award-winning film Kazaam. Even if he became a celebrity in his own right, he gives great importance to education. He just secured his master's degree and now currently working on his Ph.D on human resource development in Barry University in Miami, Florida. He said in an article that: "i'm done with the nicknames. Actually, when i obtain my doctorate, i will not allow people to call me Shaq anymore, either". Asked what will they call him, he said "Dr. O'neal". Even at his exit, he never fails to crack everyone with his humor. His retirement announcement in front of the media press were full of laughs, so, maybe that's one way he wants to be remembered - as a real and touchable person.

It's hard to find a player as dominating as he was on the hardwood, a goof ball at the same time. For the past 19 years, he has been entertaining each and everyone of us and he promised to entertain us again for the next 19 years (he mentioned in his speech that he's open for commentating, whether it's TNT, ESPN, CNN or whatever sports media outlets. Hope you're all listening, hehe..). The Lakers decided to retire his No. 34 jersey, so he'll be in the rafters with all the greats of the league. A surefire Hall-of-Famer, soon as well.

You'll be missed, Shaq (Dr. O'neal in the future). Thanks for an amazing and joyful ride. Been a heck of a career. Farewell.

God bless.

"Superman"

Hockeytown!

Certified Red Wing Fan

From now on, i'll try to put blog posts connected to my favorite team in NHL, the Detroit Red Wings. I haven't done this before for my other favorite sports, NBA and the UFC. Although, i'm not a registered or professional correspondent, being a fan (for me) qualifies me to put my thoughts, game reviews and everything connected under the Winged Wheel banner. Even if i only started to become a full-time hockey fan for at least 2 years, i've been watching this sport way back 2000, when i was still in the Philippines (a country that NEVER plays hockey) I was fortunate enough to catch some games thru our cable television for the past decade now. Right now, i'm living in Italy, a football-dominated country, so i'm using the cyberspace to be able to catch the games, interviews, updates about the Red Wings and the NHL in general. I'm still on a learning process about the sport, so, please, bear with me. I'm no reporter or anything, i'm just a Red Wing fan/blogger.

It's just sad that i started to write a blog about my favorite team after they got eliminated last month in the Western Conference Semis by San Jose Sharks (doh!), but anyways, looking forward to next season.

Bring back the Cup to Hockeytown, next season guys!

Good day.

Thanks for the memories, Friendster.

(March 22, 2002 - May 31, 2011)

More than a month ago, i wrote about Friendster losing it's profound relevance to the current social media juggernaut, Facebook. Now, i'm writing like, a "sort-of-eulogy" about the once-dominant fixture of social networking platforms.

God, how time flies by. And how time changes so fast.

I logged on to my Friendster account now --- for the last time, to remove/delete personal files from that website. Then, suddenly my mind went back down the memory lane. It's quite hard to put words together while being nostalgic. Kinda "choking" the words. I checked back on my personal profile, to write my last shoutout, thanking Friendster for all the memories it kept for quite some time now. I also passed thru my old blogs, where my immaturity and childishness happened. Funny how i come up and write blogs from before. Some of them, doesn't make sense at all. Some of them, well, discussing about certain topics/issues. But, anyways, i just want to check how much i've improved my writing skills. I also checked the testimonial/comments section of my profile. Some of the testimonials, dates way back 2004, so it's really been a while. It's also good to stumble upon my own profile preferences: a lot of funny and stupid stuffs were still there. Never moved, never changed. There's really too much to check about this place i've been for a long time. Taking it from a title of a song, i'm "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss".

I'm not being sentimental on Friendster's departure on the social networking world. The site will undergo major overhaul and will be more focused on social entertainment now (mostly, on music and games), i just don't know if they'll still keep the name "Friendster" (my guess is no). So, even in Friendster's demise, we have to celebrate it's past achievements so all we can remember are about the good memories we enjoyed for almost a decade.

But, even if i want to stave off from analyzing what caused Friendster's departure, it's an argument everyone could've had a hard time dismissing it. Before, it was a very hot item, like a can't-miss collegiate basketball prospect player. Now? it's just a thing of the past. An old shadow of itself. Don't get me wrong, i give all my due respect to the founders and everyone associated with Friendster. Nobody's taking away the success they had in recent years. It will always be like that. But, when Facebook rose to prominence, almost everyone joined the bandwagon and left Friendster for dead (even me). I barely even access my FS account for the past 3 years, so i have no idea what happened to Friendster. I don't even make time to check the then-updates that time, 'cause for me, nobody seemed to care anymore and it was a waste of time. It was like, "it has to be Facebook all the time, no more Friendster for me."

Then this day came.

Well, take it from a saying: "Nothing lasts forever". Friendster had it's glory days and success, it's just that now, maybe it's really time for them to take another step and close the curtains on their hottest and most prized commodity. But i'll always remember, that it'll be always the original for the testimonials (where friends really writes something on how good you are), the "Who's viewed my Profile?" and "Last logged-ins", and all patented firsts, courtesy of Friendster.

Well, the planned rejuvenation of Friendster will still keep our accounts, without all our personal files. But, i really have no intentions of keeping it anymore. So, as i was writing this blog, is also the time for me to close down my Friendster account.

To close this blog, i just want to say thank you to Friendster for opening the world to social networking. Becoming pioneers are a great achievement, and you'll never, ever be forgotten. We'll always keep in mind what you've done to us is something we will treasure for all our lives. It's good while it lasted.

Thanks for the memories, Friendster. Good bye.

A Love that never was

Just a week ago, i have to move out (AGAIN) from my previous place because of bed bug terrorism. I still have those bite marks that left me irritated. For a month of stay over there, i never had a good sleep (even though i woke up most of the time at 11 am), 'cause i've always been bothered with just a slight itch, so it was like i have to stay awake all night to wait and catch those bed bugs. Fortunately, the new place i moved into was such a nice place. I even have a bed that can fit three people. So, i was rolling around that bed. AND, i finally had a good, peaceful and bed-bug-free sleep.

(I have another brewing problem over that new place, but i won't say it here now. Maybe, next time.)

One good sign that definitely can say that i had a good sleep is having a good dream. Well, this dream is not just a dream: it's something played a significant role with my life. She was someone that i first talked through the telephone. Introduced by a good friend of mine from grade school. She's the same age as mine (i guess), a mix breed of Mexican, American and Filipina. I can still clearly recall her name.

Michaela Morgan.

It was during 2002, my first year in college. I received a random phone call from someone almost late in the evening. When i picked-up the phone, her voice was enveloped with calmness. I asked her how she was able to get my home phone number, she mentioned my grade school buddy. She came from a good, wealthy family who lives in Valle Verde Subdivision in Pasig. Well, me, i came from a working middle-class family who lives in the outskirts of Manila. I was so young back then, so i have this insecurity-feeling that she won't like me at all. But she was everything i had expected. Sincere, thoughtful, god-fearing person. We talked night after night, got mutually attached to one another (well, that's how i feel). And, the rest was history.

I wrote about her because, for two straight nights, i've dreamt of her. I don't know why but suddenly i felt the need to share this story. Well, the last time i've talked to her is way back 2004, and the last thing i've heard about her is that she moved to the United States. We lost all the communication and haven't kept in touch to one another, so, i don't have any news about her. I even tried looking for her thru Facebook, but, heck! There's a lot of Michaela Morgan's around the world. If only i was brave enough back then, but i wasn't. I wasn't able to tell her that i love her. My reason was --- because of our family classifications. As what i have said, They're a wealthy family and we're a middle-class family. I know it's a dumb and stupid reason for me to have, but back then, it makes sense to me. But now, obviously, it doesn't make sense at all. It was almost a decade ago now, so, now, suddenly i wonder how and where she is now.

There's a lot of "What if's" running through my mind right now. What if i told her? What could've been? Now, i know i can't provide the answers to my own questions 'cause i took a different path of life. I just suddenly felt sad that i didn't had the guts and strength to voice out my true feelings. But, of course, my action served a lot of lessons, so i know now that i'm a much better person.

I did not write this 'cause i regret not doing the right things (well, somehow, i am, hehe.. but not to it's full extent), but to remind other people that when you have the chance to say something towards a person that you love, seize the moment. No screw-ups, no shortcuts, just make a plain and simple statement. Learn in from me, who had all the chance to say it, but chose to hold back. It's a Love that never was.

Quarter of a Century!

Life begins at 25? Naw, i don't think so. Hehehe..

I just reached the "silver lining" of aging. Although i'm not that old yet to say that i've grown into a full-pledged adult, many things have thought me over the course of two decades and 5 years of my life here on earth. I admit i'm still a kid at heart: i still love watching cartoons, playing video games and other sorts, but it's something that i will always carry (i just don't know for how long hahaha!). Maturity came a bit late, but it's worth the wait.

As i re-assume my life with another year added, things get tougher than the usual. The more you aged, the more the responsibilities weighs. It's something that you can't just turn a blind eye, hence, you need to be more ready, more focused and more willing to take those challenges in life. So, whatever! (a strong statement!) to those obstacles. BRING 'EM!

I just want to thank God first for letting me continue this life that i'm having. Next, to my family, who has supported me never-ending (they actually just started especially my mom and dad, hahahaha! just kiddin' ma and pa, love ya!), and to all my friends; best friends, close friends, whatever kind of friends we have here on earth, i thank you all from the bottom of my heart. Finally, i reached a quarter-of-a-century years old (with all credits to my buddy, Philip. hehe..)

Thanks again and God bless all of you.

The House of Ideas

Time is of the essence.

Lately, me and my high school buddy were back at where we are good at: drawing and writing stories. We actually came up with different stories ranging from fantasy to science fiction and the likes of it. We've been planning to make our comic books since our heydays in high school and we both thought that now is the time to fulfill these prophecies we had for a long time, (prophecies, really?)

But, of course, everything doesn't look easy as it seems, 'cause it demands a lot of dedication, sacrifice, perseverance and faith, as well. Recently, my buddy decided to burn his bridges to achieve his dreams and goals. What i mean is, he decided to resign from his day job to go full-time on his ongoing t-shirt business and, of course, to shift his focus on our plans to have our own comic book company one day. We're still down to a very small percentage on where we want to get to, but we're on our way to get there. Me? I'm still struggling to cope up with my everyday life but i don't mind at all. I'm still here, standing strong and i'm doing my part to contribute to him.

We've housed a lot of ideas to build up on to. Unlike before, we tend to compile a lot of bright ideas, only to let it sink in our memories afterwards. So, we both learned our lesson and we try our best to document every brainstorming sessions we had. We've came up with (i think) four different stories now, but none of them are done completely. We're still trying to make time, as it was our biggest obstacle. Finding time is what we're both craving for, so we can go ahead with our planned projects. It's not an easy task, but it's not impossible to achieve.

We're still short on, almost everything, except piling up ideas, as what i have said earlier. Financially, we're not stable yet, so we have to find ways to finance this mega-project to have it stabilized, so to speak. So, all we can do now is sit back and do the best that we can do to come up with the resources we needed, even if we're miles apart (as i am here in Milan, Italy and he's there in Manila, Philippines). I'm praying and hoping for all the best to come. Maybe, you can pray for us, too..

Good day to all.

Gamers Heart Japan

The recent events that crippled Japan has sent devastating shockwaves and had everyone shocked and worried --- even gamers like me. Japan is one of the biggest gaming industries in the whole world, so it's no surprise that the gaming community were alarmed. The current crisis Japan is undergoing right has dealt them a major blow in their economy. Shortages from basic commodities and other kinds of stuff are at an all-time high. I'm not even sure how long will it take The Land of the Rising Sun to get into full recovery status. Let's just pray for the best during these trying times.

As a gamer and a fan of gaming community, it got me affected and concerned. So, it's a good sign that the gaming community all around the world are doing their part to spread the word and help Japan at any cost. My blog was way delayed from the day of disaster, but i know that even if this was a bit late to inform everyone, i know this could be helpful in any other way. I hope whoever anonymously reads this or bumps into this blog entry in the cyberspace, gamer or non-gamer, would get their hearts touched and do something to contribute.

There's a video post in Youtube (here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROHJmP_TNR0) where different people from around the gaming world show their support and compassion towards Japan. I wasn't able to upload it here, 'cause the video is an hour long, but if you have time, try to check it out.

Good day to all.

What the heck happened to Friendster?

What the heck happened to you?

Friendster.

Once the hottest brand of social networking and considered as the pioneer of this platform, ahead of Myspace, Facebook and others. It was actually this website that launched me into the frenzied social life in cyberspace (well, i had Yahoo accounts even before i had a Friendster account, but that another matter..). I've been a member since early 2003 (that's how i recall it), and up to now, that account is still on active status.

But..

I rarely see it nowadays. Before, it was something that i always look forward to visit in the internet, almost 24/7. Now? I barely even access their website. A lot of things have changed. And over the course of almost a decade, a lot of social networking sites rose to prominence, most notably, the one that took the whole world by storm, Facebook.

Facebook now sits atop among other social networking platforms, dethroning the once-mighty Friendster. But i didn't start this blog to write about Facebook. It's about Friendster, 'cause it was my "gateway" to the world of cyber-damn-space..

I was still a teenager (i'm not that old, though, hehe..) when my elder sister introduced me to Friendster. Back then, i'm such a newbie into everything about the internet, so my response to her is, "What the heck is Friendster?!!". She said, it's just like having friends from the real world, but this time, you do it virtually. You get to meet different people or get in touch with people you haven't seen for quite some time and so on.. So, me, being a nutcase that time, just sat in front of the computer and created my very first Friendster account ('cause in the next few years, i think i accumulated four more inactive accounts there..)

... And the rest was history.

For almost a decade, Friendster became a very important tool for me. It has been a witness to all my hardships, thriumps, struggles, sorrow, joy, etc.. It is the one that exposed my cerebral, rebellious years (i don't know if it really was cerebral, but i know it was very poisonous for my parents; me, being rebellious, hahaha!). It's also the birthplace of my passion for what i'm doing right now: blogging. I scanned through my past entries and they look so primitive (i mean, the way i write before) I suck badly and horribly at english back then (and i'm still not sure if i improved already..). During those years, Friendster is the only cyber network platform that's known to me. It has become my companion.

But, one day, Facebook came along.

And Friendster became a thing of the past.

What the heck happened to Friendster?

If i can recall it right, Friendster is the leading social networking site in Asia (UPDATE: they already lost that spot to Facebook because of the rapid growth and popularity throughout, not only Asia, but the whole damn world). But, that was when FS is the only known social media site. Now, i don't hear a single person who mentions FS (in fact, i haven't heard anyone mentioned FS for a long time now. It's juts me who brought up this topic). So, what the heck really happened to Friendster? Some people are labelling Friendster users "cheap", 'cause most of the people who said that are no longer FS users or never been affiliated to FS. Although i agree that Facebook is the hottest commodity right now, i beg to differ that Friendster users are "cheap". I know it's in our blood to be cheap, but i don't see anything cheap being a FS user. At least, from time to time, i still try my best to check out what's happening on the other side of cyber-socializing. It just hit me and started writing this blog 'cause no ones fussing about FS anymore. The sad reality is that, there's not so much interest looming around FS, so the main attraction now is FB. I actually came into a decision to deactivate my FS account, permanently. But then, i held myself back and just said that there's still good things FS can offer (although i'm not exploring those good things they can offer..).

One thing i noticed about FS is that they're flooded with posers. Well, i'm not saying that FB doesn't have it's own posers, but it's hard to interact with people who poses as an Hollywood celebrity or any popular individual in the world. For me, wasting my time with that kind of people is just a load of crap. So, the remedy FB came up is having a "Fan Page" for those people who were idolized by others. But, still posers are at large in the social networking community, and that's something i still yet to see get "cleaned up" by FS.

Even though FS is not the most hyped up thing unlike before, we have to give credit to FS for becoming the pioneers. If not for them, those other social media sites won't be possible or wouldn't be existing today. Friendster paved way for the modernization of socializing. Others followed through and, some of them (or to be more precise, one of them surpassed FS. We all know what that is), reached FS' goals. Not being disrespectful with the other social media sites, 'cause they had their ways to promote their platforms, but you can't help get them associated with FS, 'cause it's the one who started it all.

As i'm about to log-off now and take a rest, i was able to catch a glimpse of my FS account. It actually never changed. But, whenever i visit this site, i become very nostalgic. It reminds me of how much things have changed, but still good to look back from where you started. FS brings a lot of good and bad memories. Some of them are quite memorable, and some of them are the things that defines me. So, i give Friendster a credit for opening my eyes on how colorful, yet, brutal (brutal, eh? really?) the world of social networking is. Even though i'm more of a Facebook guy now, i don't disregard Friendster completely, 'cause it's the one who introduced ---

--- The new way to meet people.

(Friendster's first tag line)

Writer's Block (Syndrome)

This image says it all: I've been like this most of my writing career (career, eh?)

I haven't been here for more than a month (i guess), 'cause i've been in a rough patch in the month of March. I wasn't able to put a single blog entry last month because of different circumstances (no need to elaborate). So, it's nice to be back again in a place where i can fuse out and express all the feelings and emotions that's going through me right now.

I actually don't have any specific topic to write on to this time. I just thought that it would be fun to write something when you're having, a so-called Writer's Block. I'm not a professional writer, so, most of the time, i experience this "syndrome" (for me, it's a syndrome). I'm actually going through this phase right now. I have a lot of colorful and good ideas that's running through my mind, it's just that, my weakness is, to make a finish product out of it. Sometimes, i just scratch my head and say, " When will i ever learn?". As an aspiring writer, i cannot afford to be on this spot, all the time... Well, maybe all the time is too exaggerated. Ahhh, at least 90% at a time, i'm having that block phase. It's funny that at the first paragraph of this blog, i said it's that time again to write something and express the feelings i'm experiencing right now. Well, there's not so much feelings and emotions on this entry. Mainly, logic (i'm not sure again if i'm being logical about this one, hehehe..)

Having to go through this struggle to come up with a new piece to publish could lead into abandoning this new found hobby (although i've been doing this for years, i'm still a newbie when it comes into article or blog writing). But i know within me that i cannot just leave writing behind because of Writer's Block. It has been a part of me since day one of writing. It's just like my skills in drawing. Sometimes, i do experience having an artist's block and it drew a lot of comparisons on my Writer's Block. A lot of ideas, but always coming up short when trying to put it into a product. But i did not abandon my love for drawing, so the feeling is just the same towards writing, although to call myself a writer is a bit of an overstatement. I have to find ways to get over this hump that's been haunting me for quite some time now. I'm trying to explore new and creative ways to enhance my writing skills, doing my best to expand the limited capacity of this shallow mind of mine.

Well, i just noticed now that i was able to express one emotion while writing this blog: Frustration. I'm so frustrated in writing that it caughts me off-guard at times. At least that's all i'm experiencing when i'm going through this. Writer's Block, on a more serious kind, can cause depression, end of relationship, a sense of failure, physical illness, financial pressures and many more to mention (i guess). That's the scary part but i don't i'll be having one of those and i can't afford to have those right now. Frustration is enough.

I've read through all my past blog entries here to look for somethings that needs polishing of grammars and structures, but i decided not to (for now) 'cause i might ruin everything and have to start all over again. That's no fun at all. But, at least, i still find writing amusing and a good past time. I hope one day that i'll be more productive than what i am right now so i can write more meaningful blog posts.. But...

...even as i'm finishing writing this post, my Writer's Block actually blocks me right now from moving forward. Funny.

Love is...

"The most important thing about life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in."

Today is the time of the year where love is in the air. Lovers flock the city to celebrate this very special day. It has been the day that love peaks at it's highest point and somewhat a day of "surprises" for lovebirds. I don't know what i really mean by "surprises", but a lot of sweet things can go around the metro to spread the word Love.

How do you define Love? Is it expressed by giving the sweetest chocolates and the freshest flowers you can pick? It is shown by preparing an exquisite set-up date? Or is it more felt by just showing your emotions with all sincerity and respect for your loved one? I don't know what Love can mean for others, but we have own ways in showing and expressing the real meaning of true love.

It wouldn't be fair to say that Valentine's Day is just a day for couples. Single people are welcome, too. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to have a special someone. Love is for everyone. Love takes no boundaries. No special attachments. Just pure, unadulterated love.

I'm actually out of words on what to write about Love. I don't have all the words to explain what Love is. I'm not the brightest or the most compelling person in the world. But, i can express Love without a doubt and with all sincerity. A simple poem or a handwritten letter might be enough to show the sweetest thing on earth. Even a plain text message can bring smiles to your loved ones. In an Age like this, there's so many ways we can show love to one another --- it's just a matter of doing it the right way, being true to yourself, and without selfish desires. Love mustn't have any strings attached. Again, just pure, unadulterated love.

In this time of the year, i don't have any special someone whom i can share this very special day (long story, hehe..) But it doesn't mean i forgot how to celebrate Valentine's Day on my own. I have my family, my friends, and God --- and that's all that matters. I'm celebrating it my way, and for me, that's special enough.

To all the people around the world, let this day of hearts flow with overwhelming love -- and not just today, as we spread love to each and one another, today, tomorrow and forever.

Happy Valentine's Day.

God bless..

TODAY IN WORLD HISTORY: The Space Shuttle Challenger Disaster, January 28, 1986

I finally had an answer for my writer's block syndrome. From now on, i'll try to find anything significant in a day's date, like what i have right now. On my first installment of Today in World History, we look back on what happened 25 years ago in Kennedy Space Center in Florida, where the Space Shuttle Challenger disaster took place.

This catastrophic event actually happened three months before my birth (i'm still in my mother's womb back then). It's one of those events where you look back and think about what went wrong. Up to this day, it is considered as one of the unfortunate events that shape up the current world we're living in right now.

The 1986 crew of the Space Shuttle Challenger (AP Photo/NASA)

Tuesday. January 28, 1986. SS Challenger was set to go for it's 10th mission. They went through their normal routines, as part of safety check-ups before lift-off. It was beautiful morning, and it doesn't seem that anything could go wrong or anything bad could happen. Seven people makes up the crew, where this mission was set apart from the other space flights because of the diversity of the crew and in addition of the first teacher in space, Christia McAuliffe. With all hope and pride, the shuttle took off where the whole nation is watching, even schoolchildren who where at their classrooms early in the morning.

Then, seventy-three seconds after lift-off -- disaster happens, as the shuttle exploded into a white and orange cloud dust, while the nation below the disaster stood in shock and disbelief --- ended in a horrific sight. All seven crew members died that day.

Live media coverage of the SS Challenger disaster (CNN)

The whole United States, and, probably, the whole world mourned this unfortunate event. Even if i was yet to be born back in the day that happened, looking back, a lot of things could've been prevented. But on the flip side of things, accidents are very unpredictable. You could even hear at the end of this video clip where Steve Nesbitt, the voice of Mission Control, uttered the words,"Obviously... A major malfunction... has occcured." They still were able to recover the remains of the crew, and the identifiable ones were returned to their families on April 29, 1986 (the day i was born). Unidentified crew remains were buried communally at the Space Shuttle Challenger Memorial in Arlington, Virginia on May 20, 1986.

A lot of things were changed by the management and overlooked all of the future possible problems. This event was frequently used as a case study. Engineering designs, safety, the ethics of whistle-blowing, communication, proper decision-making were some of the aspects that are a part of the studies. This just shows that, from every mistake we experienced or witnessed, we learn a lot of lessons and try to improve or do something much better to avoid the same catastrophic troubles like this one.

The Space Shuttle Challenger Memorial in Arlington Nat'l Cemetery, where some remains where buried. (AP)

Today, twenty-five years after the accident, the memories are still fresh for the ones that are a part of this mission and for those who witnessed it's fall. To all the crew of SS Challenger, may you all rest in peace. As we commemorate it's 25th year, i just want to let you all know that i salute those people who wants to take another step for another giant leap for the mankind, as what Neil Armstrong said before. Let this be a reminder that even at adversities like this, we won't stop at making the earth a better place to live in.

Space Shuttle Challenger, January 28, 1986.

Eat crap, talk crap, spread crap: Racism today

"To live anywhere in the world today and be against equality because of race or color is like living in Alaska and being against snow."

- William Faulkner

"I have a dream" - a line immortalized 47 years ago by the late Martin Luther King, Jr. - is about the things he wanted to see in the future: Equality. During the tumultuos and turbulent 60's, black people were segregated and discriminated in all aspects of life. It's something people back then were not able to accomplish. Although, in modern times, somehow, we're able to minimize it, but we still have it today. It may not be as violent as it was back then, but, with all the advancements and the technoligies we have right now, Racism has upgraded, too.

I'm currently living in Milan, Italy right now. For the short span of time of stay, well, i can say, racism is still out there, maybe can be considered as on "it's lowest point." As a stranger in a foreign land like this, expect people who were really from here (some are old people; others, middle-aged), to let go of the wrath of degradation. I had my fair share of racial discrimination experience, most especially on public places. Even if want to answer back out of anguish and anger, i just let it go and treated it like an "ordinary-day-at-the-office type of problem" - even if it breaks my heart not to defend or do something for myself. It's a sad sight that the "dream" mr. King dreamt before, is still something of a hollow dream, in some of the places around the world.

When the going gets tough, the tough gets rough. When its tougher, of course, it's rougher. People of today are exposed to this kind of disgusting state we are currently witnessing right now. I wrote this blog because i checked my home page from a popular social networking site, and a few friends of mine have posts that's about racism. Of course, they're the subject of racism, and i had mine before, so, my better outlet of positive anger and distate is through this blog. We're not in the 1960's anymore. I thought people would be much better and much more understanding than before. Well, i'm not saying all, 'cause at least, i'm able to meet people from different races, who shares the same sentiments towards racism. They are really good people. We're from different walks of life, but we demonstrate love to one another. We respect each other's cultural diversities and at the same time, manages to adapt to theirs. We don't judge each other by our physical appearance. We try to improve more our lives and spread the Word of God. The Bible never taught us to be critically judgmental about others. As we do our best to become a good example to the whole community around the world, we're hoping that one day, the "dream" will be fulfilled, with all the gaping holes resolved and all the discriminative boundaries broken for life.

It has always been a challenge to tag along with people of different race. It's not difficult, but it takes you a lot of time to cope up. Well, that depends on how you get along with others, but that's something not out of reach. As a concerned human being, we have to show good example to the younger ones to treat each other equally. It's them who will carry the torch for the next generations to come and to completely put racism into obsoletion. It's not the same crap as before, but racism is still crap. No matter how much time passed, inequality still lives among us. Sometimes, rules among us. But no matter what, we are all hoping for a better place to live in, and i know we're not just hoping for nothing. One day, we can do it and be united as one.


Good day to everyone.

"For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measures you use, it will be measured to you."

- Matthew 7:2, NIV